Home again, Home again Jiggidy Jig

The Ida Hill Homestead is alive and well it seems.

The husband and I, along with mes bebes have worked our knuckles to the bone. I'm posting some pictures, with the understanding that most cannot compare then and now because they have no then to base this comparison to, but I'll let you know the know is easier on the eyes, and invites a calm order that had disappeared during the cancer journey. I think its more mind over matter, but it matters to me that my mind can function better with a little nesting like tweak. I have re-discovered, over and over this last decade that my visual space is very connected to how well, or not so well I function day to day. I do mean re-discovered as it tends to be more like a hamster wheel than a euphoric ah ha moment, I really should get it by now. Clutter even organized clutter brings about feelings of defeat, bringing about a wave of compassion for myself or others afflicted with clutter. It washes over me, not unlike the concern 0ne feels for someone who has acquired a flu bug and needs time to recover. I feel as though folks who are affected with this disease or is it a disorder? require an intervention, along with heaps of compassion and understanding. The reality is, there may not be a cure or vaccine for clutterism of this kind. A milder form is observed during the seasonal changes, such as fall turning to winter when we gather up stuff to bring inside only to release it in the spring back to the outdoors; this usually resolves itself with little effort.

I’m happy to be home, happy to be surrounded by trees and the reality of its attainability. This homestead is as close to a hundred acre woods that I covet outside my reality. Home is where the heart is, this I believe, but dang it’s a lot easier to feel at home when I have space between the homes of neighboring homesteaders. I suppose this would be a clue as to what my meditations might become focused onf during these upcoming winter months. Yup I said winter, W.I.N.T.E.R. real Canadian living…. hold up with my Poutine, Zippers, and my trusty Telephone.

Well it’s off to get these pictures uploaded, wish me luck!

Lee… it’s a wonderful life!

Life Goes On

This post is about my grandmother dying. There was a post on Zee's forum about when does a dying person know when to let go....what do they need to hear to feel safe to leave this world.

This is sort of a short form of these feelings and events that happened as it was such an intense time and I would like to write about it further, just not at this time.

My grandmother was quite ill with infection for a few months and in the hospital. (she ended up getting a worse infection and died) Anyway...for days we were on death watch knowing that she was most likely dying. She was really near the end and they took her off her oxygen and the doctor felt she would go really quickly. I had gone home knowing she was going to die in the night (after having been mostly there for days) but when my sister (who had stayed with her) called me in the morning, she was still breathing..barely, but still breathing. Everyone commented how she was holding on. One of the nurses had said that sometimes people hold on until a certain person comes from far away to say goodbye, or even a certain person leaves the room etc. I told my sister to tell her that we will take good care of Papa and that we would miss her but its ok to let go. She said ok..we were both in tears. She called me back a half hour later and she said about 20 minutes after telling her that, she died. I do think people hold on for certain reasons...This was my first experience with death and I totally saw how Im not afraid my death, its more the sadness of others still alive. I think we try so hard to keep people alive (as we should) but at some point I think its ok to let them know its ok to go and that we will be fine. It was sort of weird that day...I went to see my grandmother after she died....I looked outside, the grass was still green, people were laughing and walking around...and I thought, boy, life really does go on! Sadly, my Papa died 6 weeks later.

My Grandparents

My Grandparents both died this past summer. On a previous blog I had posted a couple of stories that my Papa told me many times. I always vowed to take a vidio recorder to keep his stories alive and to never forget what a great story teller he was...but now he is gone and I never did it! Im copying the stories here....

I was thinking of 2 stories papa has told me in the past...but I was missing some pieces...he is such a great story teller and I really want to take my video camera there and record some of the tales.
One of the stories is really how I always (and forever) envision my papa...He is very kind and non judgmental, always sees the bright side and has a very dry sence of humour which is my favorite.
He talks of a old lady that used to live in Frankford...apparently she was well educated, both her and her dh, but when he dh died, she became a recluse, sort of an eccentric. She looked like a rough, homeless person that didnt bathe...altho she did have a house, it was romoured that it was stacked full of newspapers, floor to ceiling with only a pathway thru the place.
When I was a kid, I remember seeing her in parades, pulling behind her a wagon with her dog in it. My grandfather said that she was kind and smart but rarely talked to people. One time she was walking in a parade behind my grandfather who was in a buggy being pulled by one of his horses (before I was born). This womans name was Annie. Papa said kids were yelling at her, calling her names etc... and Annie was calling back to them yelling at them to be quiet lol...the parade had stopped so papa stopped..Annie who ahd been busy yelling at the kids didnt realize the parade had stopped and walked right into the back of papa' s buggy. Papa said she was soooo mad at him (it wasnt his fault lol). Ok in writting this story, I can see that the story is really in my papa telling it lol...Oh well..this blogg is really for me and I can picture him telling it lol! Another time, Annie had told my grandfather that she had a bale of hay for him...it had apparently fallen off a truck going over the bridge (she lived at one end of Frankford, and my grandparents at another) SO she took her wagon and got it and brought it home...the next day the bale of hay was at my grandfathers house.....I just think its so funny how people connect and that I think some people are more open to other people, than others are. One time my grandparents and papas parents were at an auction in their town. Papa turned around and couldnt find his dad anywhere....and sure enough, there he was, talking and laughing with Annie.. so I can see where my grandfather gets it from!

My grandfather was working at a factory in Frankford when he got a call that nan was in the hospital in Oshawa (my papa says Orshawa). She had been staying at her parents for a couple of weeks waiting to go into labour. Some babies at Belleville hospital had died of diareah and her Dr. had suggested since she had parents in Oshawa, that she go there. Papa's car was in the shop...and he already missed the only bus so he thought he might take the train from Trenton but it wasnt till way later and he wanted to get there asap! His friend had a motorcycle that he said he could borrow anytime. Pap asked him if he thinks he'd be able to ride it to Oshawa, never having riden before. The guy said yes and showed him a few of the tricks..the first being that it didnt have any ignition switch so you had to run with it to start it, pop the clutch and go....go slow around corners cuz if you stall it, it's hard to start again. Papas only warm clothes were his reserve army militia uniform so he wore that. He got on the bike and took it around the block to make sure he could manage it..It went perfectly. He made it to Trenton, turned a corner and it stalled!! For the next 4 hours papa ran with the bike trying to start it...he was covered with sweat and grease from the bike. He went to a house and asked if he could leave his bike there, it wasnt his and he had to get to Oshawa. Papa figures that becuz he was wearing a uniform, the lady at the house said yes. So a short walk to the train station since by now it was late enough to take the train...He didnt get a ticket since from the trenton station you buy it on the train. The conductor came by and papa said ticket to Oshawa please..the conductor said "oh im so sorry we dont stop in Oshawa on this run" Papa explained the situation and the conductor said "just leave it with me". They were about thru Bowmanville when he came back and explained that they would get in trouble if they made the stop in Oshawa but they would slow the train down so he could jump off!!!! He said not to worry and explained how to do it...sort of like running in the air so when you land , you land on your feet. Papa felt there was nothing else he could do. So when they got to Oshawa, they slowed right down since they couldn't technichley stop, and he reminded him how to run to get off. Papa was really nervous but the conductor said "ok ready, go" and papa did it jsut as he was told. He landed on his feet:) He then had to walk all the way up to the hospital and when he walked in, the first thing nan said was "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN" Papa was filthy and nan said you couldnt even see his face!! And to make this story more special....nan was giving birth to my mother!

Happy New Year:)

Ahhh a new year...so full of promise :)

Here's whats on the go.....

**the ongoing assignment of creating a peaceful and tidy home

**getting some fundraising started for Annie who will have her head shaved at the Relay for Life this year in support of her friend Cass

**becoming more flexible with home learning and following their lead

**working on our health by trying to get outside every day regardless of weather....today is easy since its like 12 degrees out! Spring!!

**learning to knit socks and felted slippers!

**getting Stef to set me up with a photo bucket so I can post photos

We all have colds and coughs and feel sort of crappy. I am taking the chix to see National Treasure tonite however, since we haven't been out of the house for a while.

Its so nice to be back to our blog since I haven't been on in so long...had to get Stef to show me how to get here!!

Blogging into a New Year!

So much to say and not enough time to say it... that's why the saying "Silence is Golden" came to pass.

Most likely what I have to say is fluff anyway. What's the opposite of venting? My mum called it verbal diarrhea, sounds just about right to me! Mes bebe are fast asleep on the playroom floor. Yahyab homestead is a hit. Blue is the colour of inspiring yummy food, with a dash of henna yellow and some moss green to trim it all up. Slowly but surely (cuz it need to be done like yesterday) the cabinets are given new life by spritzing them with a few coats of paint. Once this is done 'll wipe them down and assign them each a buddy. Cabinet one will look after the breakfast foods. Cabinet two will take care of the pasta and flour. Cabinet three will house the canned items along with the almond and soy milk. It's probably best to schedule in an orientation session so we can all make sure we are in sync with each other. Gotta make sure the peas don't wind up with the oats! Oh the tea cabinet was getting a little snooty, seems she was thinking she was something special because she was in charge of the growing tea collection.. pots and all. I've set her straight, gentle reminder we are all equal in this homestead (I asked her if she noticed she was the same colour of blue as her fellow cabinets?) It's the glass... showcase and all.

Look out 2008 here I come!
I think the limb I'm out on right now is a little thin. Don't forget to catch me if I fall Lee ;)

Zee!! You're here!!!

Im so excited to see you and I haven't been on in a while!

Life..I am trying to view every minute of everyday as an opportunity to be peaceful and accept what unfolds before me..so far so good as its only 10 am and everyone is still in bed:)

I need to especially practise good listening and acceptance with my little sister who I think feels Im being judgemental. Breathe.......

Today I am doing what I seem to do with great vigor every once in a while...somehow make my home more tidy and organized, thus magically creating more space. Our home is barely 900 sq feet...Ive measured. We dont have a large accumulation of stuff...I totally believe in living simply, but every little thing we have seems to be in full view making it cluttered. Folks dont seem to realize when they leave their sh!t out on any available surface, it drives me crazy! With homelearning having its official start sometime this week, Im feeling a slight urgency to be organized.

On Annie's list of things she'd like to do: arts and crafts, letter writing, planning next years garden, have me start reading the Harry Potter series to her, library visits with a stop over at Scaliwag toys and to the Organic Underground for a drink, and Im hoping to find some sort of volunteering opportunity.

Kate..we'll see how school goes...and Stef..Im hoping her online courses will fall into being.

Thats all for now:)

ps..I did not know that Megan Follows played on the Facts of Life!!

Home Alone!

Wow Lee your yer way ahead of me... Slackerzee!

To all of our fans out there…. Bows to the left, bows to the right, notice the twinkly li’ll star on our teeth?

All by myself, sitting in front of the computer but also watching “Booky Makes her Mark” on the tube beside me, now this is multitasking.

M.F.F's (Megan Fallows Facts)
Born March 14, 1968 in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.
She played Jo Polniaczek's cousin on The Facts of Life!
I’m not even going to go Anne of Green Gables.

My deastest husband has taken a van load of children to Toronto to vist Disney World!.. I meant Wonderland. DS said this morning it's fun saying "Wonderworld" and "Disneyland" (hold on I think Disney has intellectual rights over the world and the land) What an adventure! School for the mainstream crowd begins in a few days, the rebels of our clan begin when they say, so they say ;).

Here is what's on the curriculum agenda so far:

~Create a game of cards.. using Greek and mixed mythology.
~Go fish, with magnets out of juice can lids and fish cut outs.
~Bake the best bread in the whole world, including li’ll bunz.
~Spin wool, knit the wool.
~Start a wheatgrass grow-op.
~Learn Cantonese or Mandarin
~Get back to making soap, hand cream, tinctures and wildcrafting.
~Of course the A.B.C’s and 1.2.3’s
~Ukrainian Canadian internment (creation of Banff National Park)
~The list goes on….

My RADical child is testing my ability to breathe then duck her smites seeing them for what they are. Nothing I can’t handle, something I’d rather not be doing.. but nothing I can’t handle. When she’s thirty something! I’m going to let her know, “What a ride that was, and thank you for letting me take it with you” I’m going to leave the “but…” out. Having said that, there are times when I feel like jumping off the merry-go-round, rolling under a bush, staying silent long enough to have myself believe I don’t exist in this capacity (I’m actually imagining a TV cop show where they lunge from a moving car (cop car) and tuck and roll tidy like, bouncing up on my hind legs ready to trap the criminal, cept I’m not wanting to trap anyone… just hiding for a while. My striving for Buddha nature makes each morning even better. I look forward to waking with the knowledge everything is changing even though it may not be obvious, it’s changing, some good, and yes some not so good, but each day brings the potential of much goodness. Change is good, it gives us all an opportunity to re-evaluate and change accordingly. Some grasp the opportunities quicker than others, while some let it slip away not realizing it was actually an opportunity. Did ya know hinddight is awesome unless it leaves you with regret. Life is mighty awesome!

Ten-ten good buddy…
Zee